"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize
