didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
