I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Why is your signature on my underwear?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
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Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
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I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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