i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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