that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
