i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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