i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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