By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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