another moral hangover. fuck.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
