i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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