Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
