i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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