I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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