How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
