I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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