TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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