Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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