Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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