So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
