Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
