Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
