who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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