this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
