He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh