So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize