okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
