I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
