Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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