I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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