i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
