Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
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