Who wears a wallet chain?!
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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