i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
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