It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
