Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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