Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
