do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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