I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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