hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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