sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
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