She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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