I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
