i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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