Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
