By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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