Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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