Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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