That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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