its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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