Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
